It's A Team Choice!

OK. I have been heavy for awhile now. I want to write about something fun this week. One of my good friends stands in occasional amazement at my wardrobe. Now, believe me when I say it’s not because I am the sharpest dresser in the world. In fact, when I get a little breathing room, I actually need to buy some clothes that fit. I have dropped four pant sizes in the past three years, and have gone down from XXL to XL in shirts. I do like my clothes roomy, but I guess it is time to be a little more stylish. But, as I said, when I get some breathing room!

What my friend remarks about is the amount of sports-related clothing in my collection. There’s a few reasons for this. For starters, I am a fan. Except for my guilty 70s and 80s pleasures like “The Waltons” and “Dallas,” unless it’s music related, I could watch the NFL Network 24/7. There’s just something about “Tony Romo’s Greatest Picks” that is just so entertaining. Secondly, since 1995, I have made a living at covering sports – either in print, online, or broadcast. And, over the past couple of years, I have been blessed to do a little bit of traveling. When I am someplace far from home, if I can afford it, I try to pick up something of a local college or high school team. But, the collection is not complete, so here are five teams that I would gladly wear their colors anytime!

Arkansas Razorbacks – Several of my friends live in Arkansas, but for whatever reason I have never gotten a T-Shirt or piece of clothing from Hog Nation. Seeing how Jimmy and Jerry both came from there, you would think I would have some....

UConn – As much respect as I have for the Lady Vols, I also have respect for the team that was their nemesis during much of the past few years.....

UCLA – Troy Aikman, the last great Cowboys QB played there, and that’s good enough for me. Plus, California is very cool!

Cleveland Browns – I have never bought a jersey or anything Cleveland related, nor have I ever been a huge fan. But, I love the color scheme.

Boston Celtics – I don’t consider myself to be a huge NBA fan, but if I have a favorite team, it would have to be the one that Larry Bird played for. I grew up thinking that the Lakers and the Celtics were the only teams that ever played in May and June.

And, on the flip side...five teams you will ‘Never, Ever, Never, Ever’ see me wearing their colors....

Philadelphia Eagles – Simply put, the most classless bunch of athletes I have ever seen. (Yes, I am a Dallas Cowboys fan.) Though, the teams that Buddy Ryan coached with Randall Cunningham at QB were among the best to not win a Super Bowl. In 1999, Michael Irvin lay motionless as his career was ending on the Veterans’ Stadium turf (if you can call it that)....and the Eagles fans cheered. Ugh. They even booed Santa Claus, and threw snowballs at Jimmy Johnson.

Florida Gators – Not no, but heck no. It has nothing to do with living in Tennessee. They could lose their games 72-0 and I would be tickled pink, and that’s despite being a fan of Steve Spurrier....

New York Giants – Yes, Eli Manning has a lot of grit, determination, and can lead his team back week after week....but I’m sick of him and them. Tom Coughlin acts like he woke up on the wrong side of the bed every day. And, yes, I am jealous. They have what we don’t!

USC – Putting Florida and USC on this list might make you think I am a Vols fan or something. Aside from Women’s basketball, I am not, but Lane Kiffin is an overrated pretty boy. Granted, the man does have a pretty wife, but I was one of many who laughed when Stanford beat him earlier this season. Again, not a Vols fan, but don’t let the door hit you on the way out....

Miami Heat – They were able to get it done, but does anyone outside of the area root for them? They’re so cocky, so arrogant. Almost like a team from Arlington, Texas used to be.

Well, that’s all tonight from the home of the Bulldogs, Hickman County, Tennessee – and also of the Eagles who are making their first post-season appearance this week. As for me, I’ll be in the Cougars press box as Dickson hosts McGavock.....Go DC!

Seven Years Ago

My mother was not the only person to believe in me. I have been blessed to have a wonderful father, family, and friends. Seven years ago, she went "home." I wasn't planning to write this, but waking up this morning in the middle of the night at the same time I did on this date in 2005 made me think overnight....It was a phone that rang then. This morning, I don't know.

I was coming back from an interview in Nashville when my cell phone rang around the Pegram / McCoury Lane exit on Interstate 40. It was my father. "If you can, you probably need to get here this afternoon," he said, referring to Dickson County Healthcare, a place where he and I had spent many a early morning and a late night since my mother had been admitted as a patient for about a month. Neither one of us had missed a day since she was admitted. That's something that I have to say I felt pretty good about. In just a month's time, you find out that many people do not ever visit their "loved ones" in the nursing home, including one of Dickson's biggest "movers and shakers," who actually is nothing more than the other name for a mule....but anyway...There seemed to be some kind of complication with my mother's health. You worry, but you also know that with her situation, she's probably going to be here a while. Seven years later, I can't say that I totally understand what happened or why, but there would be getting no better.....as things would only get worse. Still, how many times had we braced ourselves...and she would rebound enough to make it to the next day. There was one night, after a football game, where I stopped there on the way home, and they said that I probably shouldn't leave. Her vitals were dropping.....only to be normal again in just a few hours. So, even though she wasn't having a good day, I wasn't going to go anywhere but there....just in case.
 
October 25, 2005 (10:30pm)

It had been a long night, but everything seemed to have gotten better. I don't remember there being a moment where I think she was aware of her surroundings, but we had our goodbye moment about a week prior. I was tired--it had been a long day, plus I was to do some fill-in work at the radio station where I was working the next morning. Daddy was still there, so I thought I would go on home and go to bed. It was a down day, but there would be others....and who knows tomorrow just might be better.
 
October 25, 2005 (11:45pm)

Daddy got in, and I had just got done with everything I needed to do, and about to hit the bed. Prayed a prayer for God's will. I had learned after talking with some counselors from Hospice that it was alright to let them go. I didn't pray for that, but I did ask that God's will be done. She had suffered so much, and there didn't look to be any kind of turnaround......So, I got in bed. 104.5 The Zone was talking about the Chicago White Sox's game in the World Series that night, and I was drifting.


October 26, 2005 (12:25am)

The ringing of the phone breaks the beginning of sleep. At first, I thought it might be one of my friends who would call having ran out of gas in the middle of the night. Caller ID, however, said the rest of the story. "Dickson Heathcare,' it said. Daddy answered the phone. A football coach and a good friend of mine named Jerry Pearson once told me that the phone doesn't ring for a good reason past midnight. It seemed at the 12:20 night check, my mother's pulse and heartbeat had stopped. It was over. We drove to Dickson, and I didn't know whether I should cry or not...I was numb. After we called Taylor Funeral Home, there wasn't nothing much to do except to go back home. The sun shone the next morning, of all things.



October 27-28, 2005

For all the bad memories of the week, the outpouring of love and sympathy was great. So many of my friends from radio, music, and DCHS came by. The funeral was what funerals are supposed to be. I spoke. It wasn't that bad. The burial, however, was something else. That night, I was on the air, broadcasting a football game in Williamson County. Some probably didn't understand or understand that fact now.....but I sleep at night. Even though I wasn't "on" that night, that's where I needed to be. The week was over. 
 
October 26, 2012
 Seven years......That's hard to believe. I had people I cared about who passed away prior to you, but over time I guess you get used to it. I can honestly say that there hasn’t been a day that has gone by that I haven’t thought of you. I have been working all week like crazy, and went to bed last night at 11. I woke up not feeling too well in what I thought was the early morning hours. I looked at my phone, and wouldn’t you know it? 12:20. I’m not making this up, believe me.

You told me once to “Do what you do....Things will always work out like they should.” I’m still hoping that’s right. Some days, it feels like it’s one step forward, two steps back. But, I will tell you that my faith is stronger than it has ever been. Every time things have looked bleak, the checking account has looked dry, He has provided. Sometimes I wonder if maybe I shouldn’t have done something else, but this is me. I am doing the only thing I know to do. And, most of the time, there are no regrets. It’s going to work out. God is there, and he will continue to be. The other day, one of my friends put up a Facebook post about recognizing people in Heaven. It’s a debate that has went on for a long time. Though either way, it’s going to be...Heaven, I hope so. I couldn’t imagine not. Well, I’m gonna run for now. I love you. I’ll let you go. I hear Buck Owens is singing this morning, and I know how much you want to hear that....or maybe not!

Your son,

Chuck

Heroes

I share the tough times with you so much, so I think it’s only fair that I talk about the good times, and there have been plenty of those as of late.

First of all, I had an experience yesterday that strengthened my belief about prayer. I had posted something on Facebook a few weeks ago wondering about prayer and if things got answered. I was honest about my lack of faith sometimes. Well, without going into the situation too much, yesterday on the way back from Nashville, I had one of the most honest prayers that I have ever had – about what I had done wrong in my life (a’ plenty), what I had done right, and some fears that I had. As I was driving down Highway 100 through Percy Warner Park, I felt it. I didn’t know if it was peace, but as I said, it wasn’t a prayer of “I need this, God, please.” but of just ‘Hear Me.’

I know I am being somewhat vague, but within twenty minutes I got a phone call. It didn’t take away every cloud in the sky, nor did it solve everything that I needed to work on, but as I approached Fairview, a couple of things that I was worried about disappeared. One day at a time.....I don’t know what the answers to all of life’s little questions are, but maybe it’s not about worrying on things that may or may not happen....but taking one day at a time. I hope I’m wise to realize this in the future as much as I am tonight...

Secondly, I achieved a major plateau in my career Monday night in Birmingham, Alabama. I got to interview Kenny Rogers prior to a promotional appearance regarding his new autobiography. I am not going to ramble on and on about it, but it was a neat experience getting talk time with someone who has been one of your heroes. I have been blessed, fortunate, whatever you want to call it, to get to spend time with people that I am fans of, but every now and then, you get to do something a little special – your Kenny, Dolly, or Oaks don’t come along every day...I get that, and trust me, nobody appreciates it any more than I do, I promise you.

With that in mind, I have thought over the past few days about the word “Hero,” and what it means to me. I realize that I have been very fortunate to know some people who have inspired me – that you won’t see on the front page. I’d like to tell you about a few of them:

Jim Anderson: I met Jim for the first time back in the early 1990s, when I started at WDKN. Over the years, I have always enjoyed being around him and his wife Bobbie. Having gone through some of life’s changes the past few years, I appreciate his honesty about what he has went through. I just hope I come out on the other end as good as you have, Jim. I’m still trying to feel my way.

Jackie Bledsoe: One of many great coaches I have worked with in one form or the other. There have been (and are) some great ones, but there is none any finer. Out of all the coaches I have worked with, save my broadcasting partner Ed Sheley – who I would put in the same league, I have probably had the longest non-sports conversation with him than any other coach – at my mother’s visitation. Don’t get me wrong, many came that day. But, an hour of sharing thoughts about what he went through with his father meant the world to me then, and still does – though I could never get on but one coaches’ show!

Glynn “Chunky” Brown: I don’t know if I have ever thought about Glynn as much as I do his nickname, “Chunky.” When I first started attending Church, he was one of the first people I met. He was a friend of my father’s, but he was also a deep influence on me. To this day, I never see a pack of Juicy Fruit that I don’t think of getting one every Sunday morning as a kid. He and I also talked football a lot, as well. It’s arguable, I guess, but in my sometimes not-so-humble opinion, I think that were it not for Chunky Brown, the Burns Church of Christ might not have survived some tough times in the late 1980s. Nowadays, it thrives with great leadership in the form of elders and deacons, but I remember a time when there were none – and there were barely enough of us to cover a service. I miss him a lot, and I think there’s a Peyton Manning fan out there that feels the same way too.

John Clore: I don’t know how long I’ve known John, but I’ve got to say that he’s one of the most top-notch people that you will ever be around. He’s one of the town’s top publicists, but even though he’s good at his job, that doesn’t have a lot to do with why he’s on this list. He’s a prime example of how to balance life and career. I’m 38, and still learning. He’s got me by a few years. One of the best all-around people in the crazy world of the music business – proof you don’t have to do it 24 / 7 to be a success. As I said, I am still learning!

Lewis Grizzard: OK, I never met him. Though I did talk to him one time as he was the morning guest on WSM Radio. It his his 1989 book CHILI DOGS ALWAYS BARK AT NIGHT (also won on WSM) that inspired some of my humor, and also inspired me to write. I wish I could be as great of a writer as he was, but nobody has done so since his passing in 1994, and I’m not looking for anyone to come down the pike anytime soon. He managed to weave stories about such iconic subjects as politics, the SEC – most importantly Georgia football, and that queen of Moreland, GA- Kathy Sue Loudermilk, that conjured up my imagination. What would Grizzard have had to say about the Braves of the late 1990s, Lewinsky, 9/11, or Snooki? When I get to that newsroom up there, I would love to know!

Janie Grove: The former “First Lady” of my hometown, Burns, TN, Janie was an inspiration to everyone she ever came around. She lived with grace, and she fought with grace. I could tell you the many ways she touched my life, but her son Jason told me one that trumps it. As director of the Dickson Help Center, she touched so many lives without anyone even knowing it. He has told me so many times about people coming up to him and telling him how she touched their lives. That is what you call a legacy.

Dean Roberts: Dean is my first cousin, and lives in Florida. Aside from family get togethers, I’m not going to say that I know him that well, but he is very active in something that I admire and respect him for. He does a lot of work for some of the local humane organizations down there, and is quite often posting about some of the animals on Facebook. It takes a special heart to do that, and as someone who loves his animals, I appreciate and applaud him for what he does!

Joanna Gibson: I debated about calling her “Joanne,” but she probably would kill me. I met this brilliant and beautiful person back in 2006. If you want to know the definition of a “worker,” look no further. Few of us puts in the hours at her three jobs that she does to take care of her family. And, after most wouldn’t care, she does.

Coming To Terms.....

It’s been a couple of weeks since my last blog. Two very eventful weeks, to be exact. One of the biggest things that happened to me was attending my 20^th class reunion. Now, if you look at my pics on Facebook, or read any of the articles that I write, you might not comprehend this – but I was more nervous over attending the reunion than anything I have done career-wise lately. You go through so many life changes in twenty years. Marriage. Children. Job changes, and in some cases, that ugly “D” word, and you wonder what people will think of you. It’s interesting how you never totally change from that person you were in high school. But, I will say, it was an incredible night.

One thing I learned is you never know who is aware of you – even though you might not think so. That was a lesson I learned. But, it was just really great seeing people that, in some cases, I hadn’t seen since May 22, 1992. And, though gravity, father time, and receding hairlines had caught up with some of us, most looked the same. A few even better – not naming names, don’t want to get in trouble with the husbands – LOL...but it was really a fun night and I’m glad I went. Hopefully, we’ll do it again in five more years!

Some really neat opportunities have come my way as of late. I will be able to tell you about one of those next week, but it does have to do with that city with one of the Mannings as QB. I’m excited about that. This week, I am headed to Jonesboro, AR to cover the Johnny Cash Music Festival at Arkansas State. I am really looking forward to this, as I hope to interview Rosanne Cash – who I think made some of the best music out of Nashville during the 1980s – and the punk look was an added bonus, too!

At the reunion, I ran into an old friend of mine named Michael Evans. He’s as classy now as he was back then. We talked about this blog some, and he said he enjoyed reading some of the stuff I write about. I appreciated him saying that because I always wonder if I write too much. We all have problems and crosses to bear, and mine aren’t as bad as a lot of people’s. But, the last few years have left scars. Relationships that you thought would be there forever aren’t. You can read behind the lines, as I’m not going to go into details, but lately I have done a lot of looking around – and not liking what I see.

I never thought that I would be where I am today. You can take that in so many directions. I never thought that my career would take me to the places it has – particularity in the past year, but I also didn’t think I would be writing this as a divorced man either. But, I don’t think anyone has that in mind when they are saying their vows. The saying “one of those things” or “it is what it is” tends to trivialize things a little too much, but sometimes you just have to swallow it and move on. You can’t change the past. If I could – on my part, I would, but that’s water under the Duck River bridge now.

The thing I have learned about myself post-divorce is that it’s ok to be still. Don’t get me wrong. Having had someone in your life, it’s not easy to go back to being alone, but I don’t want just someone....I want “The One.” But, that’s not there right now. Unlike twenty or ten years ago, I can breathe. I can exist without a girlfriend / wife. I didn’t think I could before.

I have also learned – no, wait...am learning to trust in God a little more....about everything. Growing up in Church where my family went, you tend to go with the flow a little bit more than you might otherwise. One of the positive aspects of my year in Georgia was that after being down there for about nine months, I began to realize that my spiritual walk was about me – not the fact that I was Charles and Paulette Dauphin’s son, and this is where I’ve gone – and so I go....(and that is not a knock on my Church in Burns, which will always be my home. You just take things a lot more for granted in the Church you grew up in sometimes!) I can’t say that I am where I need to be, but I am in a better spot than I was. But, through the counseling of a lot of people, I think my faith is stronger than it’s been – but it’s got a ways to go. I fight fear just about every day. Fear about money, love, you name it. One thing about fear is it doesn’t come from God. So, I need to work on that. After all, since I moved back to Tennessee last fall, he has kept me afloat. My mother told me one time when I was between jobs that being tested was a good thing. Well, I could live without it....but she was right.

I guess I am writing this as a testament to my faith and what it means to me. I am not where I planned to be, nor am I where I want to be, but I hope and pray it gets better. (I realize there may be a couple reading this who will say I made my own bed....thanks for the judging.) I want my life to improve, and I want someone in it, and I want to do it right...but that’s one day at a time.

I write all this to simply say I am scared right now. I just hope and pray that God allows me a chance to start over.  I can't do it alone. I don’t think he would bring me this far not to allow me to finish it. I guess it comes down to keep on keepin on....Prayers for all of us!