Rejection Isn't Always.....

“Thank you for your submission. I really like your work, but I can’t afford you. Keep it up, though.”

Those were words that I have gotten on a few occasions – particularly early on in my writing career. They sound like a little bit less of a rejection, but still a rejection.

Or, so I thought.

I received such an email in the middle of 2011 upon submitting some of my writing for an outlet. It wasn’t the first, nor the last rejection I’ve received, but I was intrigued by the “I can’t afford you” line. To quote Dumb and Dumber, that made me feel “Maybe there was a chance.” In spite of that email, I attacked writing with reckless abandon in the summer of 2011. In a lot of cases, I wrote for the exposure and not money. I wanted people to become more aware of my work, but I didn’t have a plan to do so other than just do it. I was living in Georgia at the time, and working at a newspaper there. I was going to have to make a decision about what to do with my life pretty quick, but again, there was no concrete plan.

Then, one day while I was at work, I received a rather routine email. At least, I thought it was. It said “Special Opportunity – Billboard.com.” As a member of the CMA and other trade organizations, I got emails from to time offering me special subscription rates to Billboard – which I had taken part of before. So, I didn’t think too much of it. In fact, were it not for the fact that I was about to head out the door for lunch, I might very well have deleted the email and gone about my business. I came back to the office, and got busy and totally forgot the email. That night, as I was covering a football game, I decided to check the email. I opened up the Billboard email.

For a lot of reasons, it was the answer to prayer. More than anything, it provided me an opportunity which I hope I have made the best of since then. I don’t know what M.Tye Comer saw in my writing, but I’m glad something sparked his attention. I have written in the past that I don’t know if I belong in the same company of writers who have been – or are at Billboard, but I do take pride in the fact that I feel that I have grown a lot in those five years. I hope to continue that growth in the years to come. There have been some changes there, editors have came and went. But, I have had a solid base of editors and fellow writers who have encouraged me, such as Thom Duffy, Deborah Price, Serena Kappes, and Joe Lynch. I’ve had to be a little more proactive in promoting myself, but I’m still here. For that, I count myself blessed…and grateful.

So, about that rejection. On one of my first trips to New York after being hired, I went out to dinner with Tye and the superb Marc Schneider, who was one of my editors for about four years. Tye said ‘I don’t think I told you how your name came to my attention.’ I had always thought possibly it was through Wade Jessen, who I had known in the past. ‘It was Beville at The Boot. We were talking about writers in Nashville, and she was very complimentary of your work.’

Beville Darden Dunkerley – the editor who told me “I can’t afford you.” A few months prior, I thought her rejection was like all the others. As it turned out, it was her recommendation that got me a chance to show what I could do. The morale of this story is that if you are wondering of you are ever going to be able to make a mark in the field in which you want to, keep trying. And, “rejection” isn’t always. So, Tye – and Beville, I appreciate your belief in my work….more than you’ll ever know!

Billboard in the Trapper Keeper!

It would be interesting to know how much I have spent over the years in my pursuit of all things music. Then again, that answer might cause that instant feeling of queasiness to come over my stomach.  I spent “How Much?” While there are some regrets along those lines, I do tend to think of much of that time and expense as an investment – though if you had told me in 1988 where my road would have taken me, I would have thought you were crazy.

One thing is for sure, I started early. Whether it was using my $ 5 weekly allowance as a kid to buy tapes off of the $3.96 rack at Walmart or begging my parents for the latest edition of Music City News, Song Hits, or Country Song Roundup at Kroger, music was something that was always on my mind. I had no desire to sing or play an instrument, but there was something about the songs and the artists that I gravitated toward – even then. I didn’t know that I was being influenced at the time.

Then, one day I had gone to the mall with my mother and grandmother, and I ventured into B. Dalton Booksellers. In the magazine aisle, there was this rather large magazine that I had heard about – mainly on the weekly countdown shows.

It was Billboard Magazine.

At the time, the cover price was $3.95. So, buying it would crimp what style I thought I had – at least for that week. But, I wanted to find out more about this magazine that Bob Kingsley talked about on ACC each week. So, I bought it. I remember being so enthralled by the charts. I knew ACC featured the Top-40, but there were sixty more slots on the page – all the way to # 100. I remember taking a pen to the issue and marking the songs I was familiar with. Then, I went to the Albums chart, and marked the ones that I had in my collection. (Over the years – before I became a full-fledged journalist, I made it to 68 out of 75. I probably bought a few over the years to cross them off the list.)

As time went on, Billboard became a very useful tool for me. As I started to earn more freedom in my radio career, I did a Top Ten countdown of my own each week from 6-7pm (before the Hatchery) on WDKN. I wanted to absorb every ounce of information about the records I was playing that I could. Billboard helped greatly with that.

But, it did get me in trouble – once.

Back in eighth grade, I was in Mrs. Trondsen’s English class as she was going over the lesson for the day. I had a copy of Billboard strategically placed in my Trapper Keeper (Man, I am dating myself!) so she wouldn’t see. Well, at some point in class, she noticed I was paying more attention to the notebook than what she was teaching. I guess she had seen that before! So, she told me to hand it over. Now, most thirteen-year olds might have had a skin magazine or a truck mag…but not me. Nope, I got into trouble for Billboard.

I guess all those $3.95 purchases paid off, as for the past six years, I have been very blessed to have had over 1,400 articles published by either the magazine or its’ digital arm. I don’t take it for granted. And, I have learned to push myself in ways that I never imagined during my radio days. I wasn’t always that confident. In fact, if you had told me when the summer of 2011 what was around the corner for me, I would not have believed you. Sure, it was something I had dreamed about, but to say I didn’t have a plan would be to put it mildly. What happened to make that possible was what I thought to be rejection – and an email that almost got deleted from my server……To be continued!

My Sister.....From Another Mister

In my last blog, I spoke of my “Brother from Another Mother.” This time, I’m going to talk about my “Sister From Another Mister.” I have been very blessed to have several women in my life that could qualify as sisters, such as Regina Raleigh and Sheila Vest, but they are also mentors. The person I want to tell you about is the closest female I have that is closest to my age. Unlike Randall Kimbro, I can’t say that I know a lot of her family. Basically, aside from her mother, I don’t know any of Monica Bishop’s relatives. But, over the past twenty-three years, she has – and continues to be – one of the closest people in my inner circle, and someone who has given time and time out.

I met Monica back in 1994. She was dating one of my friends at the time. Growing up in Dickson County, I never was around many people of a different heritage at that point. Monica grew up in Dallas, and is Hispanic. She and I became friends pretty quickly. We bonded over the Dallas Cowboys. As someone who grew up in the city, she was different than many people I had become close to at that point. With the small-town background that I have, I look back and realize how limited I was in the way that I viewed things. There was a whole world outside Walmart Supercenter.

Since 1994, Monica has been my sounding board on career, love life, spirituality, and the Dallas Cowboys’ chances. The love life talks are of particular note. She used to take great delight in teasing me because I used to say things like “I wasn’t complete until I got married.” Then, after my divorce – after the scars healed, she’d remind me that was my primary goal in life, and ask “How’d you like it?” She would also good-naturedly ask me if she was “complete” before she married her husband – maybe there was a little bit of smart-assness in tone, but that is what sisters are for, right?

But….seriously. Outside of my father, nobody has been there for me in quite the same way as she has. When I moved back to Tennessee after a year in Georgia, she let me crash at her place for close to a year. I still dog sit at her house from time to time now. Besides her love of her friends, there’s also her heart when it comes to pets….dogs, cats, and a rabbit. (A really cool bunny, by the way) There’s that – and a whole lot more. For about two weeks after meeting her, I thought I was in love. (If you were nice to me at all in the 1990s, chances are I thought you were pretty cool!)…..but after that, I realized that we were only to be friends. I’m grateful for that then….but even more, now. Maybe next year, the ‘Boys will win one!